Nic Robertson , the one who convinced me to write ,

to Alison , also showed how easy he went in and out of the Netherlands , but said that the difficult thing is that one I write , can not do that endangering then what we can have , if I have to say honestly it was about hunches Alison once shared to tell about to Nic , and I'm thankfull to him to that I did write even with the painfull long time with enormous set-backs in what Alison and I thought wrong about each other , but did overcome by the fact that good news isn't allway's as big brought as bad , but we did get the good news big as the bad then , that she still waits , and that I'll make the wait easier with writting , on my own risk , is also what he said .